that bright red one on the night sky (no it won't be Rudolph's nose)

ABC News: Red Planet Outshines Rudolph's Red Nose

photo caption: The planet Mars shines its brighest on Christmas Eve.
The planet Mars will be "at opposition" on Christmas Eve, meaning it will sit directly opposite the sun. It will be about as close and as bright to Earth as it ever gets.
aw.. this is going to be lovely <3

the result of unhealthy lifestyle

4 cups of coffee per day + 4-5 cigarettes a day + stress + skipping meal + drinking orange juice when the stomach is empty = acute gastritis :p

that's how i spent my weekend
being awaken in the middle of the night by excruciating pain in my stomach, its like being clawed with hot acidic nails from the inside.. terrible :| i thought im gonna die or something. couldnt breathe, couldnt move a limb, desperately tried to somehow use telepathy to make mr. bf came and check up on me...

didnt work :P
he came like 12 hours later after i crawled around the room in search of my last antacid chew-tablet.

so yesterday went to the doctor to ask IS IT EFFIN NORMAL TO HV THIS KIND OF PAIN? The doctor said yes :p but he prescribed me a stronger medicine.
which turns out to be this teenie-weenie-eenie-bitty pill, to be taken once a day only for the next 14 days. wow..

so i guess i really hv to watch my meals, reduce drinking coffee to only one cup a day or none at all T_____________T

meanwhle in papua a large-rat was found :D

it looks pretty cute though :D yesterday i was thinking about the movie golden-compass, that the people living in the parallel universe has their "soul" outside their body, but residing in an animal. I thought to hv a big mouse trailing besides me was kinda cool, n i was thinking how big the mouse should be...
well the giant-rat recently found in papua would be just perfect :D

oh ya hampir lupa:
i already got my tickets for radiohe_ad's concert next summer ^^
and my in rainbows package has arrived (the picture below is taken from wikipedia, coz sadly i hv no camera of my own:()

big YAY!
so despite of that pain in my stomach, i also spent my weekend listening khidmat-ly (bahasa inggrisnya khidmat apa ya) to the new album ^^
and seriously, the best way to listen to any of radiohead's album is in the dark... and over, and over, and over again :P that's how i got hooked up with the band for the first time when ok computer came out :p (a decade ago).
my comments on in rainbow?
well... copying from other reviews, its worth 10-years the wait :D
i thought they wont ever gonna make another album as cool as ok computer,.. but in rainbows seriously got the band's "history" of the past 10 years in In Rainbows, coz its got Hail to The Thief in it, techno-wise like amnesiac n Kid A, but still has rocking energy like ok computer :D
guys, thank you so much for the album :D
(i sound like those fanatics... yea.. whatever.. really love this album :D)

and here below is a DIY video instruction (huh? @_@) of in rainbows when the album hit the stores next year..

and im havin another cup of coffee now :D cuma setengah sih..

i'm dennis kucinich

with little knowledge on US' politics n state welfare... :p i bravely took the quiz n got this result :p

a quick googling on dennis kucinich reveals that ..... he's got a nice slogan xD "Strength through Peace" - which i dont think would sell much with the majority of american conservatives.

dan pose fotonya dong :p "peace" gitu.. reminds me of my own pics xD

seems like that he's a nice humble man :D (melihat pose fotonya, kqkqkqkq)

komentarnya chauft: "idih kamu ada republicannya"
ya... i know :">
chauft's a hardcore democrat xD
1. John Edwards (smpet jd calon VP bareng Kerry)
2. Joseph Biden, and
3. Barack Obama (u know him)

FW: Your Discbox has been despatched.



From: []
Sent: Monday, December 03, 2007 12:15 PM
Subject: Your Discbox has been despatched.



Just to let you know…

Your “In Rainbows” discbox has now left w.a.s.t.e. in the UK

You can expect delivery of your discbox in the following estimated times.

UK 1-8 days

Europe 1-14 days

Rest of World 5-18 days

Wherever possible (especially to customers in the USA), we’ve sent these by road and sea.

December is a busy time of year for postal services globally, so please be patient.

We thank you for your custom and hope you enjoy your discbox when you receive it.

Best wishes.

us @ w.a.s.t.e.

btw yg bener tu bukannya dispatched ya? i wonder if the letter 'e' was intentional? could be a secret message? hmmmmm...

anyway, 1 December kmrn was World AIDS day (WAD). WAD katanya wikipedia awalnya from UNAIDS, yg ngadain country leader summit on 1 dec 98, dan hence ngejadiin hari itu sbg world aids day.

after 9 years of the initiative, i would say that there's been more attention to this disease than a decade ago. this year's theme (or 2008's theme to be exact. 2007's almost over) was actually "Stop AIDS. Keep the Promise - Leadership".

InsyAllah di Indonesia HIV Breakout ga separah di Afrika. Mungkin masi banyak yg enggan buat 'periksa' or hv safe (free) sex. of course 'Taboo' would be the main cause. Watched MTV last nite on this reportage in India, dmn org2 masi enggan buat periksa or encourage safe sex. like Indonesia, free sex n having anything to do with this disease can cause a big shame to anyone, his/her family, n anybody who knows him/her :D

tp yah, mngkin persepsi yg salah jg. coz majority in Indo main causenya injected drug use (IDU). ato sebenernya unsafe sex tp banyak yg ga mo ngaku :p
The HIV epidemic in Indonesia is among the fastest growing in Asia. The majority of HIV infections are estimated to occur through the use of contaminated injecting equipment, unprotected paid sex and, to a lesser extent, unprotected sex between men. (Ministry of Health Indonesia & Statistics Indonesia, 2006). When surveyed in 2005, more than 40% of injecting drug users in Jakarta tested HIV-positive (WHO & Ministry of Health Indonesia, 2007), and about 13% in West Java (Ministry of Health Indonesia, 2006). In addition, many injecting drug users also buy or sell sex (Ministry of Health Indonesia & Statistics Indonesia, 2006). In 2005, approximately one quarter of injecting drug users in Bandung, Jakarta and Medan said they had had unprotected paid sex in the previous year (Ministry of Health Indonesia & Statistics Indonesia, 2006). In Papua province (bordering Papua New Guinea) the epidemic is more serious with unprotected sex being the main mode of transmission. In a province-wide population-based survey in Papua in 2006, adult HIV prevalence was estimated at 2.4%, and reached 3.2% in the remote highlands and 2.9% in less-accessible lowland areas. Among 15–24-year-olds, HIV prevalence was 3% (Ministry of Health Indonesia & Statistics Indonesia, 2007). 2007 AIDS Epidemic Update (USAID, December 2007, p.24)

The UNAIDS Indonesia country profile has some facts on the level of AIDS epidemics in our beloved country. Altho i think the data came from their 2005 report. shown on the page was the number of people living with AIDS in Indonesia is 170,000. however the most recent report by WHO showed that the number has increased to 193,000 (ranging from 169 000 to 216 000)in 2006 (WHO, 2007).

Here's a 2007 review on HIV and AIDS in Indonesia. Recommendations includes the wide-spread of condom use especially in places where sex-trade is common, encouragement for AIDS counseling and testing, improving the local health system in Papua (besides, Indonesia is a very heterogeneous country, you cant apply one kind of system n hope it would work in all regions), establish one national monitoring system and evaluation, strengthen self-help groups and networks for people living with and affected by HIV. It's also found that most of the time treatment and services did not reach their target groups, and that many STI drugs, clean needles, syringes and condoms supplied to IDUs who were contacted were inadequate.

hOWEva.. our ministry of health has set some national plans&goals for 2007-2011, and regions such as Papua, West Java, together with 4 other provinces with the most affected population (Bali, Jakarta, Riau and East Java) signed an MoU in 2004 that they are committed to combat HIV/AIDS, and had made amendment to public and justice policies regarding drug addiction, control of HIV/AIDS, etc. Except jakarta, yg notabene sejak pemilihan gubernur yg baru kmrn blm nyiapin policy apa2 soal ini. more on those stuffs are available on the WHO report :D

now back to work...

yes, i admit im being cheesy

after my reunion with punk bands, i relapsed to cheesy, down-toned stuff =/ songs played incl. this one ->

i'm feelin this

semalem longpura kedatengan tamu org indonesia.
mrk stayed at the Golden Tulip hotel, deket nieuwezijdskolk, n sebelum mrk dateng tu org hotelnya nelp k resto, nanya makanan d resto halal apa engga. so i told them klo yg dr islamitische slagerij d sana cuma lamb sama chicken. but of course we also hv fish n shrimp dishes. n then the hotel-person told me that there's goin to b 3 people on their way to the restaurant.

kay.. dan ta-da... 3 org indonesia masuk. kesan pertama: "ufh, orang indo nih, bakal susah nih."
soalnya experience sy ngelayani org indo adalah sbb:
1. ga pernah ngasih tip :p
2. ada yg bakal sok kayak majikan dan babu
3. ada yg bakal sok keren sok tajir jln2 k eropa n because of that she/he is a total hottie

negative-thoughts aside, i approached the table with my most friendly face n talk to them in Bahasa. awal2nya emg kerasa klo pada jaga jarak dikit. the ppl turned out to be some kelapa-sawit kebun owner. 2 were from medan (husband&wife) n the other man was from surabaya.

and "the wall" started to crumble when they askd me about my religion :p they didnt believe at first when i said im a moslem, they askd me to cite the Shahadah (buset xD). well mereka bilangnya "coba baca".. i was like (ermmmmmm.... baca.. apa? but then i tried my luck by citing the shahadah.. which satisfied them.. kqkqkqkq xD)

they were like these umm... bapak & ibu culun :D lost in Europe, probably just got a lot of money thx to the kelapa sawit plantation.

ibu Medan: klo mo foto2 pke baju belanda di mana ya?
ulma: oh.. ke volendam
bapak medan: ke sana naik apa?\
u: oh, bisa naik bis
bapak surabaya: aduh jgn bis dong, taxi bisa ga?
u: *nyeh?* bisa om, bisa ^__^" tp bapak ibu harus coba naik kendaraan umum d sini, beda sama di indonesia soalnya ^_^"

bapak medan: klo mo belanja2 barang high quality d sini dimana ya?
u: (buset, barang2 high quality? wuts dat? :p).. umm kalverstraat tuh pak, deketnya dam square (mo bilang pc hooftstraat sih tp ribet ah ntar ngasih tau jalannya :p) ~ come to think of it kayaknya harusnya i should just told them bout pc hooftstraat. ga kebayang mrk beli2 baju d wonder woman xD

yah.. then i spent some more time at their table, chattin. the restaurant was not that busy, we had a group of 16 n there's another table of 4. my boss and sam (another colleague of mine) were working as well, plus the bar-woman. the bapak surabaya got 3 children all of them went to switzerland to study tourism. (my head went ka-ching!)

they ordered gado2, pepesan, soto n udang goreng tepung. i apologised if the taste was not as good as if they were in Indonesia. but they're very nice n did not complain at all. the bapak from surabaya even ordered 1 extra portion of Gado-gado for take away. emg beda kali ya.. attitude pekerja dan pejabat :D

when they were ready to leave they askd if i could call the cab heheh. i knew they would ask sumthin like that. but quite understandable. myb it'd be 15 minutes walk to their hotel, n the weather last night was also not tropical-people-friendly. they were actually had just arrived n should be very tired.

in the end they also gave good tip! (a RARITY amongst Indonesian guests). it was a nice experience really. made me less pessimistic towards my fellow countrymen :D ow yea, they also askd if i could find some friends that could accompany them touring amsterdam today. i couldn't go myself coz i hv to work. setelah telp org2, si prima, vina dan ifta bersedia :) awww thanks girls!

before this there were also 3 Indonesian coming to the restaurant, myb 3 or 4 months ago. forgot what they ordered but they signed the guest book (yea the restaurant has a guest book that can be signed by guests, pretty neat :) some people wrote poem, drew pictures, n scribbled things that did not even use the Romanian alphabet :D). two weeks ago (i think) my bf went to the restaurant n was leafing thru the guest book. he stumbled on the page where the 3 ppl signed.

[reconstructed conversation ~my memory fails but this is more or less how our conversation went]
bf: "wah, suciwati pernah makan di sini?"
u: "suciwati siapa?"
bf: "istrinya munir"
u: "what?? can i see?" *lookd at the book n immediately remembered the night with the 3 indonesian*
"no way! she's munir's wife???"
bf: "iya.. ni ada asmara panaban, usman hamid, it's got to be her"
u: "n who are the other two?"
bf: "asmara panaban is a noted lawyer in human rights, and usman hamid is the exc-dir of KONTRAS" (the Commission for Missing Persons and Victims of Violence)
*at this point i really2 felt embarassed & ashamed of myself*
"i remembered mr. panaban coz he gave me his credit card n i commented on his name, 'wah namanya bagus, asmara'.. HOW LAME WAS THAT!!! n when mr. hamid signed the book suciwati said 'dia artis lho mbak', i was just like 'huh?! oh klo gt jgn lupa tanda tangannya ya ^^' BEGO GA SIH???" O_O
bf: "dont worry, i dont even know them by face, so if i saw them on the streets, i wouldnt recognise them either"
u: "but u would recognise their names rite?"
bf: "yeah" *grinned widely*
u: "thank you, but that doesnt make me feel any better" -.-

if only i read TIME Asia 2 years ago i would have recognised her.. xp~

image source: TIME asia Magazine's website
picture credit: Since her husband's assassination last year, Suciwati Munir has become a voice for justice
maybe that's the reason they didnt leave me any tip -.-

oot since i watched that travis barker video my ears found comfort in this:

at the end of the day, n i was closing the restaurant (incl. blowing out more/less 30 candles xD) si alvin, 16 y.o. anak baru d resto (works in the kitchen), was about to go home, he said bye2 to me n umm he motioned his right fist towards me, n stopped mid-air, .. split-seconds, i realised that the right thing to do was to move my fist the same way. our right fists met n wow i just did a cool hand greeting :D suddenly i felt young again :D myb next time he would teach me a "hip" or "gangsta" or "street" greeting :D

arriving at home, flipped the channel, n guess what.. korn's concert (mtv live) was on :D yay.. head-banging to korn was a perfect closure for the day ^______^

is this awesome or what? :D

the drum was sooo cool.. you can completely ignore the stupid rap in the background :D
yeah, that's blink 182's travis barker. he might also be +44 but for me he's blink 182 :D *mengenang masa remaja, when me n my bro rockin in the car all along the road from malang to jakarta*

you can view the original song here. proves that wicked drumming can turn a lame song to uber-cool :p yea.. soulja boy is the new (dance) craze y'all!

my radiohead dilemma

i know that ppl r downloading the songs for free on the internet. if u go 2 radiohead's website u can buy the new album there, where at the 'checkout' u can fill in urself how much u want to pay for the album. u can guess that A LOT of ppl filled in 'nul', 0, nada.. tragic :p
.. or not
still dont get why the band chose this way for their album.
anywy, i decided to order the discbox instead.
ya tribute to my fav. band... masa tega amet sih
and the discbox is 40 pounds... "including sending cost".. wow.. i know a friend's living in Indo n he wonderd if the guys really mean it.

yg jelas until now i refused to listen to any of their songs (my bro offered me the mp3s, which he got from limewire... disgrace -.-)
daaan 10 minutes ago as i listend to accu radio.. 15 steps was played.. aaaaaaaa... noooo... tores my heart :'(
i want my first in rainbows to be a high-quality audio track coming from a collector's item CD.... T_T

test your skill in detecting whether something/someone is korean/chinese/japanese here. (u'd hv to register first). got the link from sietho.
so far baru ngerjain 2 exams.. faces n modern art. scored badly in faces xD commentnya "obviously you dont know the difference". lol.
got an OK on the modern art.

Test Name: Faces | Modern Art

Average: 7 | 9

Yours: 6 | 10

Date Taken: Nov-9-07 5:29A | Nov-9-07 5:30A

what else to defrag besides doing quizzes

Which Trainspotting Character Are You?

i'm an under-age schoolgirl who likes to blackmail lonely-foolish guy after a one night stand.

i used to be hyperballad but now i'm the hunter

Which Bjork song are you?

You're the *pause* "Hunter"...go you!
Take this quiz!

duluuuu around 2003/2004 my test result was hyperballad

hyperballad is actually the song when of being too long in a relationship :p the feeling to throw things out of the cliff in order to come back home and be nice to the spouse (oh hello darling, good morning :))

ehe so does this means that im more stubborn and aggressive than i used to be? :D
I'm going hunting
I'm the hunter
I'll bring back the goods
But I don't know when

I thought I could organize freedom
How Scandinavian of me

anyhoo, on other quiz, im still chocolate chip cookie :)


pls stop me whenever im about to give my heart to any man
('cept when he's the leader of the decepticons)

aaaah.. marry me, megatron! :D

ulma haryanto's reaction on seeing 2girls1cup :p

so.. Neo aka TK aka Che Kin aka Tsz Kin (dang so many names he has :D) my Cute Long Pura colleague

(that's him in the middle)
masih single.. jadi klo yg berminat bisa hubungi saya :D

askd me to view a clip called two girls one cup (SERIOUSLY DONT CLICK ON THE LINK!). the clip was so euw.. (and j*nc*k n what the hell). neo actually collected some reactions of ppl who's wtching that clip. you can view his "library" here. the clip n the clips of people who's watching the clip r currently a trend here (otherwise it wont be on Jensen's show.. or so i presume).

you can also view other ppl's reaction while watching the clip here. or type '2girls1cup' on youtube's search field.

but here below was my reaction :p

nothing exciting, really.. just me sayin euw and j*nc*k n wth.. :p some ppl gave out funny reactions.. and if you dont know what the clip's actually about.. well you'll get curious.. and myb you regret when you finally watchd it.. like me :(
i appreciate that you are really keeping your words
just tonight i did some housekeeping for my head
the last time i did everything in a rush
did not properly put everything about you in a box
and store it away
left some things here and there
so i could "accidentally" stumble upon it
keeping the maybes and ifs

let's just say i finally decided to label them as clutters
and treated them as so
relocate them to where they really belong

by so i've created more space in my head
now i hv less stuff to juggle by the day

and as the song sung by Erykah Badu goes
"I guess I'll see you next lifetime.."

trash art

Maybe, maybe it's the clothes we wear, the tasteless bracelets and the dye in our hair. Maybe it's our kookiness.

Or maybe, maybe it's our nowhere towns.. our nothing places and our cellophane sounds. Maybe it's our looseness.

But we're trash...
You and me.
We're the litter on the breeze.
We're the lovers on the streets.

Just trash.

Me and you. It's in everything we do.

Maybe, maybe it's the things we say, the words we've heard and the music we play. Maybe it's our cheapness.

Or maybe, maybe it's the times we've had, the lazy days and the crazes and the fads. Maybe it's our sweetness.

Words by Suede (Trash).

Coz i'm feelin kinda trashy :p

What Kind of Blogger Are You?

What Kind of Blogger Are You?

Greed: -2

You're not in this for the money, for you blogging is all about the passion! Sure you might make a little pocket change now and again, but you know that it's the content, the audience and the people that are what makes blogging great!

Experience: 2

You've been blogging since Nick Denton was in diapers. When it comes to blogging experience, you are the authority on blogging. Heck you probably even have a blog where you give advice about blogging! (weh.. moco ceh??)

Sociability: 1

You love web 2.0 stuff like Digg and Delicious and you're involved in more blogging groups, networks and activities than anyone else you know. With all your connections, you make Neil Patel look positively anti-social! (wehhh moco ceeeehhhh???)

thanks, Jack Vinson

Now playing: John Miles - [Dirty Space Disco CD1 #06] Stranger In The City (Pilooski Edit) [foobar2000 v0.9.4.1]
via FoxyTunes

babies r born in the same building people go

it's sunday morning (11.25 am.. jd blm masuk noon :D), i had my breakfast, drunk my coffee..
prima td bikin sandwich pke rosbief dan mozarella (yum.. thx prim!)
yeah prima's been my roommie for last couple of days.. her room is not yet "ready" (masih kosongan) that's why she's staying at my place.
like the good old days eh prim? :D
short info: so according to Myers Briggs Personality types me n prima r total opposites. she's an esfj-extrovert feeling while im an intp-introvert thinker

so now im looking at my draft blog posts n see if i can finish at least one. so why not start with my Ramadhan evaluation, heheh..
well actually nothing much really.. there were days that i could still control myself.. but those were also days that i went berserk n did selfish things or being too curious about someone..

in the sector of "keeping my loyalty n restraining myself to emotional temptation", i failed :P

things happened n made me realise that im not yet spiritual or relationship-wise mature. still like to take shortcuts, did not always mean what i say, largely because instinctively im a people-pleaser :p

there's always next year isnt it.. (?)

Now playing: Pure Saturday - Kosong [foobar2000 v0.9.4.1]
via FoxyTunes

posting pembuka: end of Ramadhan

he's got an arm off!
Originally uploaded by cakeyvoice
Selamat Hari Raya Idul Fitri bagi yg merayakan, minal aidin wal faizin.. Taqobbalallahu minna waminkum :)

and to all, mohon maaf lahir dan batin :D

for those who are having their birthday today: happy birthday :D
have a zombie knitted rag dolls :D or a pot of honey :D

now a tad bit longer..

first of all, gw ketiduran this morning :P jd ga ikut solat id xD

altho udh ditelp yussi n elvin berkali2.. tetep ga kebangun xD

boneka salmaanyway, in the spirit of Eid, i would like to introduce you to moslem barbies :D
di Indonesia udh mulai ada, yg bikin namanya Bu Sukmawati Suryaman. Her dolls are called 'Boneka Salma' (bandwidth exceeded xD duh kasian) - (Republika Online)

selamat buuu :D you are so creative :D

Emg ternyata boneka barbie versi muslim is not exactly new :D
there is a Moroccan Barbie, and a veiled doll called Sara in Iran, and one called Razanne for Muslims in Britain and the US - Fulla is now the market leader. (The Guardian)
While pabrik2nya bilang klo muslim barbies enhanced self-virtue in young girls ada juga yg oppose kayak this blog
"Poor, poor young Muslim girls. [...] Thank you male dominated corporations for making girls all over the world have skewed body image and fucked up sense of self."
The author think that fulla dan lain2 itu cuma alat cuci otak soal self-image. sama aja kayak barbie. (blonde-anorexic-bimbo-dog poo-picking xD) - see picture for reference :p

dog-poo-picking barbie

Ga tau deh bakal di-export k belanda ga barbie2 muslim kyk gini :D well i actually do not hold any grudge against barbie. soalnya i know she has nice collections (ada yg seri princess, ada yg dresses from around the world), dan ga sebitchy bratz :D bratzaltho dulu pernah ada bbrp artikel yg criticizing barbie yg dibikin dgn badan sangat tdk manusia (pinggang extra kecil, dan big tite boobs). bikin anak2 kecil punya obsesi kurus (and blond? :D) kyk barbie. tp yeaa.. i disagree coz i played with barbie n i just didnt think that way. barbie is barbie, it's a DOLL (gile gw wktu kecil dah punya pikiran kyk gt :D)

tp emg eneg jg kadang klo masuk toko mainan, dan ngeliat barbie2 yg sangat western :P (iyaa.. i know there are also 'other races' barbie.. but still..) trus di sampingnya... BRATZ. I wonder when the time will come when we can see Razanne or Salma on the till side by side with those bitchy bratz :D

link artikel dari reuters

More on Eid.. hari ini di Amsterdam cuaca cerah :D the sun is warm and gentle.. the leaves have turned golden. And as the wind blows, they all seems to be dancing and floating in the air, like golden butterflies :D

buat yg masih puasa.. met puasa :) ayooo kmu bisaaa

i'll keep you in my prayers, you're in my thoughts and in my heart :)

mood hari ini :(

ow yah, i've been using Bahasa Indonesia interface for Blogger :D need some time to get used to Posting, Pengaturan, Panel Kontrol, dan Konsep disimpan otomatis di :D

somebody asked if i've spent most of my time in front of the computer. erm d'uh.. yes of course.. who doesn't?
but now come to think of it, myb he's asking indirectly whether i'm a computer geek or not :D
answer is.. yeah :D i'm lightly nerdy, and 50% geek

annd.. menurut moon chart di samping, malem ini udh bulan baru. Besok lebaran.. aih.. time to review the things I promised/told myself to do at the beginning of Ramadhan :p

*mempublikasikan posting*

the waltz-silje nergaard

Strike up the band let it play
Love songs to haunt me and I will stay

But when it comes to a waltz
both words and music will ring false

For you waltzed in and spun my world

Around in dizzy dance I swirled

But suddenly you waltzed away from me

Those violins, they must go
So no careless hand with a bow may play
on the strings of my heart
and make me remember how lovers part

How you waltzed in and spun my world
Around in dizzy dance I swirled
But suddenly you waltzed away from me

Strike up the band let it play
whatever it chooses
and I will say,

Play me a waltz if you will

I'll sit here and listen
waiting until my love returns

to take my world and spin it' round
in dizzy swirl
Where girl loves boy and boy loves girl
and feet don't touch the ground
i really am good for screwing things up :D
i wish time could really heal

facebook for life

yeaaah so i admit that i've been logging in to facebook quite regularly for the past weeks. and i also admit that i finally gave it a try. dan ternyata cukup adiktif :p it has these widgets and games and "apps" dari berantem2 pke zombie/werewolf/vampire sampe punya binatang piaraan :D
membuat friendster terlihat sangaaaat lammmmeeeee...

so my favorite applications at facebook for the moment are:
1. The Zombie/Werewolf/Vampire app
awal2nya i was infected by a friend of mine (dapet notification klo i was infected). dah gt after turning myself to a Zombie, and Werewolf, and Vampire, i can infect more ppl and fight with other zombie/werewolf/vampire ... to gain level :D yah awal2nya jg ga gt tertarik sih, tp begitu ppl started biting me in order for them to gain level, dan ngeliat org2 itu naik level n turning themselves to a scarier er.. ya.. ga scarier, weirder kali ya (ice vampire? fire werewolf?) jadi panas juga :D so everyday i got 5-7 chances to attack other creatures (ga harus v.s. creature yg sama). yah abis itu ada fight club jg sih. tp kinda lame soalnya cuma bisa berantem sekali sehari :( oh ya,.. you can also be a slayer and beat those evil creatures :D i'm all four so i'm basically very flexible and very confused :D

2. (Fluff)friend :D
ini yg bisa piara2 binatang gt. i'm having a mouse of course :D trs mouse-nya bisa dikasih makan (harus beli dulu d shop), ato ganti habitat (background pic), ato nge-race fluff friends yg lain. my mouse has their own (fluff)book profile :D trs gmn caranya dapet duit buat beli2 makanan/habitat? yak caranya dgn mem-"pet" binatang2 piaraan yg laen :D (or place winning bets on the race). tadi2nya kan ngira cuma bisa ngepet piaraan temen2 doang.. tp ternyata bisa jg ngepet binatangnya temen (selama yg punya masi on the same 'network' klo ga salah).

Oh iya, di facebook jg lebih 'restricted' soalnya you cant just view other people's profile unless you're on his/her friends' list (or on the same network.)

*) Jadi d facebook ppl are 'grouped' within networks, bisa berdasarkan regio/negara tempat tinggal, tempat kerja, atau sekolah

di dunia e-biz sendiri facebook sering dijadiin bahan diskusi: dari trend penggunaan aplikasi facebook - ada sekitar 5000 aplikasi, dan yg "top-listed" punya jutaan pengguna. Walaupun 87% dari semua itu cuma tefokus ke 84 aplikasi, dan hanya 100,000 active users (ga dijelasin sih kriteria active users apaan.. log in k aplikasi sekali sehari? ato sekali semenit? :P)

saingan facebook klo d amrik paling myspace yg lebih banyak dipake sama bands and artists buat promosiin diri (myspace bisa upload lagu dan video, bisa streaming juga dipagenya). tp toh menurut desas desus fb jg bakal nyusul buat bikin artist platform and mp3 store :p

anywaaaaaaaaaay yeah its an okay tool for notworking,.. oops i mean networking :p
altho i'd rather spend most of the time fighting with my zombie and feeding my ulmaaaaa (as oppose to 'socialising'). ya socialising ke luar atuh... meet some people, shake their hands, touch their hair, gaze deep at their eyes, hear their laughter... du du du

these are the things that had happened as i failed to control my feeling

last 2 weeks had been hectic..

several cases of emotional abuse
hurtd ppl
making promises and compromises, running from it
lied and cheated

do/say things that myb i shouldn't

and now ppl seems to move on
while once in a while they got reminded of painful memories

short sweet bliss followed by many tormenting guilt

i keep reminding myself of how much/worse this can get.. please think for the sake of others and not yours :D

think that i'm not young anymore :D

funny that these all has to happen now. at the holiest of month.
funny that all of us hv to go through this
funny that why now and like this, not at some other time, some other place
i pray for good things to come to all of us
i pray for this to make us at least closer to the Straight Way

اهدِنَــــا الصِّرَاطَ المُستَقِيمَ
صِرَاطَ الَّذِينَ أَنعَمتَ عَلَيهِمْ غَيرِ المَغضُوبِ عَلَيهِمْ وَلاَ الضَّالِّين
Guide us to the straight way; The way of those whom you have blessed, not of those who have deserved anger, nor of those who stray.


gila ya ganteng2 banget mereka *ngiler* click here for lyrics

nia i'm going to get you for this :p

Rules :

  • Each blogger must post these rules
  • Each blogger starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves
  • Bloggers that are tagged need to write on their own blog about their eight things and post these rules. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
  • Don't forget to leave them a comment telling them they've been tagged and to read your blog.

    8 Habits:

    1. scratching my head even though it's not itchy
    2. sleeping with the computer on and music on the background (lights off!)
    3. touching my nose/lips whenever i feel nervous/thinking
    4. at least a cup of coffee a day
    5. the clothes that i wear on that day is the ones that's on the bottom of my "clothing pile"
    6. count in almost everything i do(when washing my hair, brushing my teeth, applying lotion&deodorant, but not chewing :D )
    7. first things i do when i open the internet browser: check my feeds on google reader, and log in to friendster
    8. spray perfume on the neck, back, both arms and ankles before putting my clothes on

    People whom I want to tag are (i'm not sorry :p)
  • INDONESIA EARTHQUAKE: Sizable aftershocks are likely to be felt along Sumatra's west coast for the next two weeks following Wednesday's quake, a local media report says. Many people are still sleeping out in the open, either because their houses have been destroyed or because they are too scared to return home in case of further quakes. More than 20 people have died and over 100 have been injured. Aftershocks have triggered activity in three volcanoes in the area, according to the head of the country's volcanological survey. But he said there was no risk of an eruption despite signs of magma movement.


    Features, pictures and blogs:

    According to BBC and Media Indonesia Bengkulu province still need more tents for its refugees  as well as medical staffs

    Indonesia’s quake-relief aid agencies and donations



    manual ribs

    { I don't want to fall in love } { I don't want to see the stars up above in the sky } { I just wanna catch your eye } { I don't want to be wined and dined } { I just want to bump and grind with you here tonight } { Because you move so right }

    { And we Dance (Dance) } { And we move a little closer } { Dance (Dance) } { Oh yeah with that triple motion } { Dance (Dance) } { And we move a little closer } { Touch a little tighter } { Eyes a little brighter } { Because it's not love } { But it's still a feeling } { No it's not love } { But my body's reeling } { To move closer next to you }

    { I don't want to hold your hand } { I don't want to go walking in the sand every day } { So won't you come out to play } { And I don't care what people say } { I don't care what your friends will think anyhow } { 'cos you've got me here right now }

    { And we Dance (Dance) } { And we move a little closer } { Dance (Dance) } { Oh yeah with that triple motion } { Dance (Dance) } { And we move a little closer } { Touch a little tighter } { Eyes a little brighter } { Because it's not love } { But it's still a feeling } { No it's not love } { But my body's reeling } { To move closer next to you } { To move closer next to you } { To move closer next to you } { To move closer next to you }

    Now playing: Pipettes - [We Are The Pipettes #10] Because It's Not Love (But It's Still A Feeling) [foobar2000 v0.9.4.1]
    via FoxyTunes

    Indonesia quake update (Reuters)

    INDONESIA EARTHQUAKE: Thousands of Sumatrans are camping out in makeshift shelters or tents, two days after a massive earthquake struck the Indonesian island. More than 40 powerful aftershocks have triggered a series of tsunami warnings in Indian Ocean countries, and international aid agencies are rushing to see what they can do, but there are still no reports of widespread casualties in the quake-affected area of West Sumatra. Reuters pictures show Indonesians treating survivors and gathering up pieces of their shattered homes.


    Other news from ANTARA


    wishing us all Ramadhan Mubarak

    hari pertama puasa niii :D
    after my not so meaningful Ramadhan last year, I started this one with a hope that it wouldn't suck as the last one -.- altho pas Eid-nya menyenangkan :)

    dan di awal puasa, semakin MENYADARI klo puasa d sini susah :P
    klo di Indo, kita puasa bersama.. sahur bersama.. buka bersama..
    di sini? people are just doing their thing just like any other day :D
    ya tetep makan, ya tetep being emotional, ya tetep being pissed off at each other, making wars.. ck ck ck

    but of course I shouldn't let those things let me down. Anggaplah itu challenge :D test for faith. Now its kinda funny coz i always question my faith n suddenly now is the month to prove my loyalty/belief to that faith.

    i'm still in doubt, yes. not to the Almighty Entity or the Truest Religion. I'm in doubt of myself. Will I ever comply myself as His Ummah.

    and yesterday night my Dad sent me an SMS asking "Why do we have to observe Shaum in the month of Ramadhan? What is the objective of our fasting?". I replied with a long story on how kind Allah is and that Ramadhan is an opportunity to practice self-restraint bla bla bla. And Dad asked, "Yes.. Pretty close, pls refer to something when argueing".

    I was on the tram on my way home, from work, was tired, and now Dad's asking me for a reference.. dang -.-

    yah op kors the answer (I think) can be the Surat Baqarah verse 183

    يٰأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ آمَنُواْ كُتِبَ عَلَيْكُمُ ٱلصِّيَامُ كَمَا كُتِبَ عَلَى
    ٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

    'O those who believe, the fasts have been enjoined upon you as were enjoined upon those before so that you be God-fearing.'

    So simply, because we are believers, and fasting means to really abstain from committing sins, and this by increasing our fear to God.

    dan self-restraint itu susah :P it means that I should not:
    * whine
    * complain
    * jajan2 (duh td otw k kantor kebayang2 coffee company.. bagels n beans.. sanday sandwiches.. wok to walk.. wagamama.. innocent smoothies... hiks)
    * blow off quickly
    * think of ways to make other ppl miserable

    dan yg paling susah..
    * procrastinating

    it's almost like what i'm doing now.. :p

    anywy, it's also interesting that when I typed 'puasa' on Technorati, the first 10 blog post results are from Malaysia.. So I guess Malaysian bloggers are still in the lead than Indonesians :D ayooo let's kick their butt! ee.. whoops.. no bad thoughts.. shoo shoo..

    ah ya.. kerja kerja..
    buat yg menunaikan ibadah puasa.. good luck n sterkte! heheh

    UPDATE: Thoughts and prayers to those who are affected by the quake in Sumatra

    Factory Girl

    Factory Girl is a relatively new movie (released Feb 2007 in the U.S. n Europe) - tp ga ingert klo pernah ada iklannya :D

    it's a movie about a girl called Edie (played by Sienna Miller -exnya Jude Law), a movie prop/friend of the famous Andy Warhol (yup, that famous contemporary artist.. played by Guy Pearce). For me watching it was a reminiscence of the glam world of the 80's. The movie is centered on Edie and her relationship of Warhol's art community/groupie. Warhol in this movie was on his way to fame, and he has "compounded" some people in one place called the factory. A place where, like Andy and Edie said it, people can be themselves. This includes having sex n doing drugs whenever, wherever they want. Andy also at that time started to make movies. Underground/cult movie where it has no plot, and no edits as well. So Andy basically have people to sit down and talk about themselves, and audience can hear Andy's/Chuck's (Andy's second-director in charge) voice directing the person/asking questions in the background. (Semi-documentary kind of). Most of the time Edie is the star of Andy's movie, telling her life-stories, yg emg complicated (and glamorous).

    Helped by her good-natured personality, beauty and lifestyle she shortly becomes the icon and eye candy for Warhol & Co. Edie was then nicknamed 'poor little rich girl. Like today's Paris Hilton, Edie was a daughter of a local millionaire. But less fortunate, she was the victim of his father's infidelities and cruelty, she then rebelled, went to art school and then splurged herself to the artist community in New York, where then she meets Warhol. Knp poor? Soalnya she basically just spent spent spent and did not earn money. (Except from his Dad). While Warhol reaped fame and fortune from his movies, Edie has none (well only the fame).

    Like classic fame n fall story of life, Edie then opened herself to cocaine (yes kids, drugs is bad for you). Her life slides downward since then. Well a moment of light came when she met a famous folk singer (Hayden Christensen) -> loosely based on Bob Dylan, named Billy Quinn. He showed her things that are larger than life. In the end of their relationship, "the famous musician" asked her if she wanted to leave The Factory. But of course since at that time her mind was bewildered from cocaine, she refused.

    Since the movie is based on a true story, of course it ends tragically. Edie died a young age (28) from a drug overdose. Jadi saya harap neither Lindsay Lohan nor Amy Winehouse would further waste their talent to drug-addiction :p

    official website
    ; imdb entry; rotten tomatoes entry

    this was originally written last night before i'm going to bed.. on my new phone :p

    The problem with myself has always came down to one line: I sometimes just don't know what I want in my life. Even if I know, sometimes it's not specific enough, or I have no extra motivation to achieve it.

    I am not a competitive nor an ambitious person. If I don't get things my way, I'd compromise. That and I always said to myself, nothing really matters. That sometimes life is just a big joke. That God granted me life just to make me realise that it's not worth it. (Yezz.. only the afterlife matters... why do we have to be here anyway?)

    Plus, my sense of inferiority really hinders me from really wanting to achieve anything. (I am the so-called under achiever :p)

    Adding to that, it's been always hard for me to commit to anything, to anyone, even to myself. Bad for relationship, I know. so that's why I think less of myself, of what I want, and have this "if he's happy then I'm happy" thought in my head. which is wrong :p

    What if that i wont find out what I'm good at for the rest of my life? My parents wont be always here to defend me. I don't want to be those mid-forty who is still complaining how shitty my life is.

    Shit it's just because of the rolling stones show in mtv n watching factory girl. there was this guy, Russel, on the show that really reminds me of myself. He has a lot of talents but he also tends to screw everything up by being disrespectful to his job (which solely because he disrespect himself).

    The factory girl is a movie. will review it later :p

    Ruben once offered me to do "something that i like" in between my overwhelming tasks :p And i was completely baffled, lost for word coz hv no clue what it would be :D

    But well I think I'd offer myself to work on our website since it really needs a lot of updating.

    this is not about anatomically correct bone socks

    I got a day-off from the restaurant today, just finished off sending the latest contact info of and to all countries, masih ada international evaluation report menunggu. but what do i do? i decided to blog. while i have no topic whatsoever to write. there is some, but cant decide which one to write first =/

    seriously, i've been trying to figure out what to do about my future. i was thinking of doing this grad stuff in Sweden.. something in development field. why development field? well, i've been working for NGO's for almost 2 years now. and i really enjoyed it. for the meantime i always wished that i could have more 'field'-experience than behind-the-desk stuff.

    makanya when i read the programme i had this thought "hmm.. isnt it more useful if i hv some real experience?", i mean.. in the end i want to work for indonesian communities. not for European or African (my current job, n a previous one are about those two continents). so there are three programmes that i've laid my eyes on: management for international development (condong k organisasi2 aid tingkat dunia - world bank, un.. might b to heavy for me :p), development studies (this i think would b useful to have more knowledge on what i'm dealing with, .. lagian asli, selama ini kan knowledge cuma dr kerja langsung), and communication for development (klo diliat2 ideal banget, ngegabungin communication management n development work.. tp kok gw bosen ya ma comm :p heheh.. lagian he said that uni-nya baru gt.. jd kemungkinan kurang punya nama :D yea like INHOLLAND)

    my personal opinion is that it's useful to have some experience first, before doing a grad-study. well here i am with my experience. not a lot, i know. and not specifically on the field that i want to work for in the future. karena jelas aja, ways n needs org afrika sama orang indo beda banget. afrika tu bener2 under-developed, sementara indonesia well majemuk banget. masalahnya gmn cara ngeratainnya? how to get those smart n well-developed ppl to spread their knowledge n experience to under-developed regions? ow yah, blm lg di indonesia ada yg after-disaster-aid, sama yg emg fokus k development. dan coz its more visible on the news, yg after-disaster ini yg lebih banyak ngundang attention. sooooooooo emg gw kurang experience banget buat development work di indo -.-

    tp klo gw pulang dulu, takutnya entar susah buat ke eropanya.. =/ meanwhile i think indonesia bisa belajar banyak dr sistem aid-organisation d sini.. (or yeah so i thought, never really2 work in NGO di indo.)

    but again, jadi ato engga kuliah lagi jg tergantung gw lulusnya kapan..dan bisa dapet scholarship ato engga. altho tuition fee d sweden ndak ada.. tp at least buat living cost. coz si uni-nya bilang klo study-nya bakalan berat u wont hv time for part-time job xD

    anddd lately i hv this urge to do some art-sy stuff. yes yes myb its because of that personaldna thing. but i also think its nice to try out a new hobby. lagian i'm a hippy at heart.. so why not try painting :p (or pottery, or whatever). i'd love to learn to play the guitar but unfortunately i dont want to sacrifice my fingers. oh i'd love to do yoga as well

    hah seriously.. if there;s anything that needs development.. its myself -.-
    yeah myb i need to wait until a couple of months before making a real decision..

    and now im trying to actually save money. what for? ya for my future. any decision i made, i will have some financial support for it (either itu continue a grad-education, pulang k indo, ato ngajak keluarga jalan2 d sini :p ehehe)

    Me the Considerate Artist

    credits to Bapak Amir K.

    Hereon I sincerely declare myself as a considerate artist kqkqkq..
    the test result made me sound like a very nice erm.. soft-hearted, emphatic person *gg some more* (i dont even know why i cant stop giggling) altho i disagree with their use of the term 'PersonalDNA'.. and setelah dilihat2 lagi i found some cases of bad english. For instance: spontaneity instead of spontenaiety, want instead of one.. well that's all i guess :p

    and so, i think Personal Quilt is more appropriate than PersonalDNA.. coz it really does look like one

    (Mouse over any part of the box or strip to learn more about the traits that the colors represent)

    My personalDNA Report


    ill men owki llm en ow iwa ntt odi e

    this violent imagination of mine

    in my head i was playing the scene
    over and over again
    we are in this situation where
    i am standing
    with a monitor screen in my hand
    and again and again
    i slammed it to your head
    till your skull broke
    till you choke blood
    until you lay motionless on the floor
    and your scream
    that had been such beautiful music
    to my ears
    had stopped
    and i feel extremely
    and happy
    and i would smile
    the widest smile I've ever made

    unsent 2.0

    Dear [censored],


    Thanks for your mail.

    I hope you’re having a great time in [censored]

    Congrats for your upcoming wedding


    I always think of you as a character in a fictive novel I won’t bother reading

    And I’m surprised that you still sent me this email


    In other words: thank you for telling me but I couldn’t care less



    Yours Sincerely,





    It’s either I’m too nice or I don’t have the guts to send this email xD

    huckleberry finn

    Adventures of Huckleberry Finn!

    by Mark Twain

    With an affinity for floating down the river, you see things in black and white. kinda true.. i'm learning tho, that the world has a lot of 'gray' shades

    The world is strange and new to you and the more you learn about it, the less it makes sense. small correction: PEOPLE are strange :D

    You probably speak with an accent and others have a hard time understanding you and an even harder time taking you seriously. not that i speak with an accent but I think I have an annoying (?) child-like voice, and i tend to mumble :p so.. yeah

    Nevertheless, your adventurous spirit is admirable. You really like straw hats.
    xD well.. straw hats and straw underpants :D

    Take the Book Quiz
    at the Blue Pyramid.

    heheh.. kocak
    well come to think of it, i do like the story.. Ingetnya sih dulu nonton filmnya.. ga inget udh baca bukunya pa belum. Taro di reading list ah :D

    Wikipedia entry on the novel

    't was a lovely sunday

    Last Sunday the 15th was Elvin's birthday. so elvin, yussi n aji planned to go see Harry Potter in the morning (coz its cheap), while me just grabbed the opportunity to also go to pathe and see transformers (yay ^^ and it's cheaper!) dragging uda chauft with me. Fortunately both movies started almost at the same time and at the same place. Transformers was played at 11 while HP was at 11.15, both were screened at de Munt.

    Habis nonton, we went to Golden Chopstick to have a dim sum brunch ^^ my and uda chauft's first dim sum meal btw.
    and for the first after years and years not, i ate Ceker ^^ (that brown thing in the middle of the table). As you see, my bone-pile is actually the smallest, padahal kita makan more or less the same amount of ceker. It is because when I eat ceker, i popped the whole foot into my mouth and chew the whole thing, crunching and munching the bones, destroying them as i suck the meat off =p~ Ceker's bones are soft, so.. it's actually easy to chew them into little pieces. Afterwards, I always try to spit out all the bone-residue as gracefully as i can :)

    Oh ya, on the chopsticks was the squid ^^
    it was very slippery and hard to grab with the chopsticks. And as you put it in your mouth, you would wish it wouldnt suddenly come back to life and squiggle inside :p (jadi inget those live octopus that Korean people eat)

    Makan bareng tidak lengkap tanpa foto2 ^o^

    so we tried to take a pic of us together, in several takes :D

    Take 1 (with Elvin holding the camera)... hahahaha.. are you sure you get us all?

    Take 2...she needs to lower the camera a bit :D

    Take 3...(uda chauft's holding the camera)hahaha..too low xD

    Take 4...(still him holding the cam...) and finally

    yay.. it looks good! everybody looks happy :D

    hi Dad :)



    More on my job and Holland -> still working at Music Mayday as Programme Officer. My contract is going to be until end of this year, and I only work for 20 hours a week (5 half-days, as shown in my signature below :p)


    I still work at the restaurant as well. But I moved to another one, it’s an Indonesian restaurant and is nearer to my office (15-minutes-walking distance). Payment is one Euro higher per hour (6, usually 5), and I don’t work long hours (6 or 7 pm to 11 or 12 sometimes 10 pm instead of 4 pm to 11 pm), but I do have to work more days (5 to 6 days). Tip is better since this is a CLASSY Indonesian restaurant :D (have to wear a kebaya, and be super-duper nice and womanly to customers).


    Holland is nice but not too nice yet. These couple of days has been sunshine and mild rain, last week was heavy storms, and temperature fluctuate around 16 to 24 Celsius. You never know when is it too warm to wear a jacket or too cold to wear flip-flops (a.k.a sandal jepit) :D


    Political parties in Holland also entered some heated discussions on the policies regarding amnesty-seekers and illegal immigrants; a 3-yr-old Dutch child went missing in Rome; somebody smuggled drugs between exported tulips; dan a 17-yr-old teenager was hit by a train in nearby city because he dared with a friend to cross the railroad at the last moment before the train passed. Sekian inti sari berita dari The Netherlands :D


    Tadi juga dapet SMS dari Itha Supriyono yg barusan test kerja d Nestle. Coincidentally my ex-high school friend was also there taking the test, this morning I was surprised when I received two very similar text messages (one from Itha and one from my high school friend). And yeah, turned out that they met during the test and decided to send me an SMS :D


    FYI during high school there was this time when I went to Yogyakarta with my friends from SMUNti Ngalam and to save cost we stayed at Itha’s residence :D dapet meal, entertainment and free guide-to-Jogja as well :D And afterwards Itha also visited us in Malang.


    Miss you Love you!







    Ulma Nurriva Haryanto

    Programme Officer


    Music Mayday International
    Elandsstr. 44
    P.O. Box 266
    1000 AG  Amsterdam
    The Netherlands
    T. +31 (0)20 4222455
    F. +31 (0)20 4222456




    I am working Monday to Friday from 1 to 5 pm