(19-3-2006 4:39:38): Ulma.. Wishing you all the best. Sekompleks-kompleksnya, kalau Ulma nyaman dan bisa menanganinya, monggo..

kata temen saya: kenapa kmu harus cari kebahagiaan yang setengah-setengah, klo kmu sebenerny bisa dapet sesuatu yang utuh?

humm.. one of my innermost deficiencies is, that i never could be able to do the things that I always told people to.

weekend to-do list
Sabtu: (Judulnya) Girl's Day and Night! Ikut Elvin n Andhys k Perpus Amstelveen, disambung ma ktemuan ma Nia (and lina?) d Centraal.. makan maoz (+ brownies HRC), 7.30 nnton sad movie d film museum.. Balik k elvin, PJ party :p
Minggu: Kerja :D

gaya lu ul pke to-do list sgala..

Other to-do list:
merampungkan draft FD
ngitung utang tlp :p
bayar rumah (& tagihan2 laenny)
mengunjungi bapak manakala mood, manakala sempat, manakala mendesak
do my laundry

Other news:
I didnt see MEW :'(
But got a nice t-shirt though :)
my new boss at the restaurant is one hell of a perfectionist!!
dan istrinya akhir2 ini suka sering dateng k resto
bantu2 (do stuffs n bantu2 mrintah)
both baru 20 tahun
dah punya anak umur 2
tough life..
bokapny skrg mutusin buat kerja pontang-panting (he's working 7 days a week(.. bikin restonya maju.. for the future of his daughter (n he's just twenty!! two-o)
nyokapny berhenti skolah (both sbenerny juga udh ga skolah lagi), she had decided to raise the daughter on her own, (meaning she's just 18 when she made that decision!!)
and now lg mendalami dunia manajemen resto brsama sang suami

akhirnya 2 hari yg lalu ketemu lina.. stelah skian lama tak bertemu (heheh)

anyway, i believe a lot of meaningful things had happened before and all-around me, every day.. tp sometimes im just too tired (or lazy) to extract all of them.

oTHER newly-realized personal-deficiency: i tend to memorize bad/negative things, exaggerate them and neglect the positive/good things, long-term speaking.

Pa lagi yah.. oh yea, im sppose to be sleeping now.. heheh..

the real purpose of economics

the study of economics is not just about money..
it's about satisfaction. How people interact, work their ass off.. to be satisfied..

uh huh.. okay,..

time travel is lonely and i need you so much closer

Wednesday 8th 2006:
So.. what's on Melkweg tonite?
dont ask me where had the band came up with the name, but..
sure their gig was awesome :)

band pembukanya john vanderslice.. trio dgn drummer yg sangat keren dan jago :D
and if you go to their website you can also download some free mp3s..cool

they played for around 40 minutes before giving up the stage to the sound-people team, buat prepare the stage for DCC.

anyhoe (thx Ni, yg udh nularin gw with JD's fav phrase)
they played some songs juga dr album2 yg dulu. dr album baru (plans) cuma 4 or 5 songs. konserny cuma sejam doang, 11.30 udh selesai. in total around 20 songs i guess.. termasuk title n registration, sound of settling (kata widy: "bak pao..bak pao.. this is the sound of selling.." XD), a movie script ending, crooked teeth, summer skin, soul meets body,..
encore-ny mrk maen 3 lagu, n yg terakhir translaticism :) my favourite! gw dah hmpir sedih aja wktu ternyata smpe mereka cabut dr panggung (sblm encore) tp lagu itu blm keluar.. well actually i waited for one other song, 405, tp ya su-lah, hehe

the people turned out to be more crowded than i had expected.. abis kan gw kirain jarang yg suka DCC. tp ternyata tiketny sold-out,.. n melkweg de max pun jd sesak banget. we nod our head together.. moving it up and down, side to side, flowing with the rhythm..
smpet spot bbrp anak indo juga d dalem.. including mba nina n mba arin

all-in-all, quite a nice nite, hehe
next most-wanted gig: MEW

musings at 2 pm

i wondered if i should send a bomb-threat to that arrogant regional manager so that he would cooperate with my n nia's project

i dont want to work today because i prefer to watch a concert in melkweg

prima is going back to indo tomorrow

the new honey and cardamom flavor from DE tastes nice :) n so does the cold ammaretto.. yummy =9~

semalem k oom fred
dikasih one pack of that coffee + 1L of orange juice, hehe
makan rendang juga :)
tp lbih enak pas yg gw bikin sndiri :D ha ha ha

nia sent me a card :)
thanks thanks thanks
she's such an angel, Gbh

prima is still at work
she got paid well

i wonder what isrina's doing rite now
how's with her uk-visa thing
she said that she met dewi @msn
tp wktu itu gw msti buru2 cabut
jd gw bisa ngobs2 ma mereka

we watched mba mey n mas gun's wedding video
videony suka skip2 sndiri
they just got married
sooo cute
its like they are meant to be with each other

im still this insecure person
wondering what kind of person i will be
what kind of life i will have
the (un)lucky man that will have to spend his days with me

again, they say writing is good for your mental health

JengTha, yg sabar ya.. remember that he's a JERK
aurelvin, maabkan diriku yg blm bisa keep my promise =/
nchrut.. im sorry
i know i hv to still pay the rest of my phone bill :p hehehe
gimme ur contact info in indo n myb my mum can pay it hehe..

wuaa d sini mba mey masak ikan arsik
menyenangkan ^_^
batre hape mo abis

cardamom tu kapulaga

masih perlu read more books

im so lucky to be given the chance to meet wonderful ppl
oh dear
i miss mum
i miss dad
n i had a bad dream last nite
i think i should message them

cant help myself to not to be depressed :p

Please could you stay awhile to share my grief. For its such a lovely day
To have to always feel this way

And the time that I will suffer less. Is when I never have to wake

Wandering stars, for whom it is reserved
The blackness of darkness forever

... Those who have seen the needle's eye, now tread
Like a husk, from which all that was,
now has fled
And the masks, that the monsters wear.
To feed,
upon their prey

(always) doubled up inside
Take awhile to share my grief
(always) doubled up inside
Taunted, cruel.... ...

Wandering stars, for whom it is reserved
The blackness of darkness forever
im tired

i want to leave it all behind
cover my eyes n ears

hi im 21 n im hated by most of the ppl i know
myb if im sad lonely n depressed the world would b happier
myb if i slit my wrist open again
my misery will end
n ppl wont b bothered by this pathetic creature