I came for you
Just to feel you
Finally
Break in two
I would that you
Spoke with no words
Like paper cuts they hurt
Cicada
Sing like it was afternoon already
Call for your Love
It is built soon to end
This heart is
You rendered me
Unprotected
My feet part
Off the floor
I would that you
Spoke with no words
Like paper cuts they hurt
Islamic Economics
Picture it. In the not-too-distant future, the US economy is teetering after decades of debt accumulation. Paper transactions and excess consumption carry on relentlessly despite the growing depletion of real capital. Speculation spirals out of control just as banks start calling back their credit. Policymakers disregard financial prudence in their pursuit of Pax Americana. And then a worldwide plague or a terrorist attack provides the tipping point for total economic collapse.
What then? Will economists have learned any lessons? To answer this, we might begin by examining the ethics of capitalism. Or rather the lack thereof. Capitalism is famous for being free of moral considerations. To neo-liberal economic guru Milton Friedman, the expectation that business bears any “social responsibilities is a fundamentally subversive doctrine.” Capital’s only expectation is to increase profits. As a result, we operate in an economy where business administration students are taught that “greed is good,” competition is stressed over solidarity, and the poor are left largely to fend for themselves.
In light of this moral vacuity, it doesn’t come as a surprise that the world’s rich have rigged the global economic game in their favor. People in the north sit back and enjoy their treasures while their southern neighbors struggle to survive. Even ostensibly well-intentioned efforts to alleviate global poverty like the World Bank and the International Monetary Fund (IMF) manage to make things worse. Since the establishment of these financial institutions 60 years ago, the income gap between the first and third world has widened, and today 1.5 billion people live on an income of less than $1 a day.
The people of Argentina know all about the dark side of World Bank/imf prescriptions. They don’t need to imagine what an economic collapse might look like. In 2002, after years of following directives to deregulate markets, reduce public spending, and liberalize trade, Argentina found itself in a financial mess. A country that had been trumpeted as a great success found itself reeling as austerity measures caught up, investors got scared, profits fled the country, and the national debt-load mushroomed. Argentinians watched helplessly as their banks were closed and their savings evaporated.
World Bank prescriptions elsewhere have been equally devastating. Under Structural Adjustment Programs (SAPS), developing countries have been required to devalue their currencies, slash their civil services, privatize state assets, and remove price controls and import tariffs designed to protect local industries. In a country like Zambia, the effects have been so overwhelmingly negative that many people are convinced sap stands for “Satani ali pano” (Satan in our midst). Thanks to the World Bank, young children often can’t attend public school because fees are required, purchasing power has taken a nosedive thanks to the devaluation of the currency, and curable diseases are left untreated because of depleted health services. The policies have literally killed people. Even the bank is conscious of the dark cloud hovering over its saps and has changed their name to Poverty Reduction Strategy Papers.
The irony of course is that rich countries force poor ones to open up their markets and liberalize their trade policies but don’t adhere to their own exhortations. Perhaps the most egregious example of this is the $300 billion doled out in farm subsidies every year by the EU and the US. With so many third world inhabitants engaged in subsistence farming, the elimination of agricultural protectionism would do wonders for southern economies.
Can such a corrupted economic system be redeemed? The World Trade Organization has chided the US for its cotton subsidies, and Americans may eventually be forced to abide by their free trade rhetoric, but such minor corrections will do little to improve the long-term prospects for global economic justice. Any real effort to address third world poverty will require a sweeping economic paradigm shift. And a cataclysmic collapse might be the only way to bring that about. But what if, up from the ashes, a new economy infused with a moral compass emerged?
The growing discipline of Islamic economics hints at the potential to hardwire an economy with ethical considerations. For centuries, Muslims have blended economic principles with religious law, known as sharia. In the past few decades, this synthesis has evolved into a formal system of Islamic economics. Under this arrangement, the basic framework of the economy is left up to the market, but it is also organized around ethical investment rules that prohibit putting money into companies that profit from alcohol, gambling, tobacco, weapons or pork-related products. Islamic economics also mandate participatory arrangements between capital and labor and a ban on interest. This rule stems from the understanding that since Allah determines the failure of a financial venture, the borrower should not be the sole bearer of the cost.
As formalized Islamic economics has gained adherents, Islamic financial institutions (IFIS) have enjoyed enormous growth rates. IFIS engage in real economic activity – as opposed to passive speculation – and make money work as capital, not debt. Even though Islamic banks are beholden to principles of social responsibility that make them less profit-driven than western interest-based banks, they have proven to be quite lucrative. There is even an International Islamic Financial Market charged with charting the course for about 200 Islamic banks and financial institutions around the world. And the principles of Islamic economics don’t just apply to banks. Sharia insurance firms are also gaining popularity.
Concepts like ‘no interest’ might seem fanciful to western skeptics, but an economy with a moral code could provide a refreshing relief for the world’s poor. Unfortunately, it might take an economic collapse to make it happen. But once we’ve dusted ourselves off and begun to rebuild, there will be no place for neo-classical financial thinking. Thankfully our Muslim brethren will be ready to provide us with the tools for an alternative system.
- Nicholas Klassen
(detail of painting by Shirana Ahahbazi)
dicomot dari: Adbusters magazine #54 - 2004
The Big Thing Called Life
the more u think about it the worse it gets, the more complicated it is
that's what life is about
that's what life is about
how to make a me-cocktail drink ^^
| How to make an "Ulma" |
| Ingredients: 5 parts success 3 parts humour 5 parts ego |
| Method: Layer ingredientes in a shot glass. Top it off with a sprinkle of fitness and enjoy! |
| Your Icecream Flavour is...Neopolitan! |
 You aren't satisfied with just one flavor. They say variety is the spice of life and this shines through in your Ice cream of choice! Just don't eat all the chocolate and leave the strawberry and vanilla behind! |
hehe.. lagi iseng brosing2 trus nemu inih..
to find a divine inspiration
Hehe.. kayakny judulny sangar ya :p Well, ak cuma seneng soalny nemu 'Mew' the Danish band (bukan room-butter cookies), sukaa.. kerrenn.. 
.
Yg nyanyi suarany tinggi banget, skilas kayak cewek. well mereka main musikny unik, rata2 musisi Skandinavia emang nawarin bentuk musik yang gak lazim di kuping. Contoh yg gw suka sih, wannadies, cardigans, dan yang baru2 ini gw ikutin: MEW.
dari mana gw tau mereka? dari widy, dan stelah gw cek2 d friendster, orang yg suka mew dalam network gw.... cuma dua, hehehe.. si widy itu, ma adek gw, bil.. heheheh.. yah knowing 2 of my closest people like this band, i said to myself.. why not? jadi langkah pertama saya untuk cari tahu tentang ini band adalah.. minta sample mp3nya ke widy, hehehe.. (males banget deh gw). trus gw dengerin.. ouch.. ulm terpana dan langsung suka!
dah gitu gw yg mule nyari2 websiteny si mew kan, trus ada satu song yang gw suka banget, 'she spider' keren abis pokoknya.. pas nyari lirikny di google, turned out klo tu lagu dipake buat soundtracknya 'Spiderman 2'and i was like,.. 'WHAT??' hehehe.. d websiteny si Mew juga ad lagu2 laen dari albumny yg paling baru 'Frengers' (Frengers, they said means not friends but yet not strangers). So i listened to the song, which was streamed from the beginning till the end instead of a 30 second demo. And there's this one song, 'Her Voice is Louder than Her Years' yg ada suara cewekny. Pengen tau siapa yg nyanyi, gw ngubek2 websitenya, akhirnya tau klo vokal cewek di lagu itu was performed by Stina Nordenstam. Namanya aneh ya.. i bet it's Danish ;p well anyway, gw ngerasa klo tu nama asli familiar abis, so i googled the name (F.Y.I. kata guru gw, pak Don Ropes, istilah 'Googled' udah scr tidak resmi masuk k dalam vocabulary bahasa Inggris) and found her website, tapi d sono gw ga nemu judul lagu or nama album yg familiar. Masih penasaran gw cek ke VH1 en Launch, but still.. ga ad juga. But then, just like out of the blue, (benernya ga juga sih, Allah yg ngingetin gw), gw inget klo ada lagu d Soundtrackny Romeo and Juliet (klo masi inget, itu pelm teen-romance yg paling keren d akhir abad 20) yg judulny 'Little Star'. Who's the singer? yepp.. STINA NORDENSTAM! hahaha.. aduh gilaaa gw yg langsung sneng gitu. Pasalny gw suka banget ma ni lagu, and glad bisa ngetrack lagi penyanyinya! She has this unique voice, and i missed her, hohoho... langkah selanjutny, of course nyari mp3nya.. tapi karena ga ada Kazaa, me cari pake metacrawler. Nemu sih, tapi hasil remix-an Little Star. Not bad, rada drum n bass gitu kali ya. Further on, ga nemu mp3 yg memuaskan :(
Well yah.. berkat brosing2, tanya sana-sini.. i could collect a few pieces to put on my inspiration corner. So kini nama Mew dan Stina berdampingan dengan Thom Yorke, Gorillaz, Blur, Oasis, dll., di pojok ruang inspirasi saya :) Oh i love the internet, i love those f*ckin cool rock bands! ge inget dulu nyari2 the wannadies, death cab for cutie n juga tuesday child, prlu ngubek ngubek seluruh world wide web yg sangat very cramped dengan promotional stuffs, new ideologies, ads, pop-ups, silly directories, and many more. Yg waktu gw nyari tuesday child lbih lucu lagi.. but i'm not going to talk about it now, cuz i'm so damn sleepy :p so anyway, hari ini.. saya nyatakan sebagai hari pencarian inspirasi, sbnernya frase 'divine inspiration' gw colong dari Tickle.com ;p dari tes yg gw ikutin, katanya sih gw dapet divine inspiration dari Learning New Things. Well I guess once more the quiz was right ;)
Btw sampe saat post ini dipublish, ak blum nemu gambar yg ngeliatin 4 personel bandnya, lengkap, tapi juga ga ngerusak layout blog :p so.. gambar sang vokalis, Jonas Bjerre saya rasa cukup mewakili, heheheh..
.
Yg nyanyi suarany tinggi banget, skilas kayak cewek. well mereka main musikny unik, rata2 musisi Skandinavia emang nawarin bentuk musik yang gak lazim di kuping. Contoh yg gw suka sih, wannadies, cardigans, dan yang baru2 ini gw ikutin: MEW.
dari mana gw tau mereka? dari widy, dan stelah gw cek2 d friendster, orang yg suka mew dalam network gw.... cuma dua, hehehe.. si widy itu, ma adek gw, bil.. heheheh.. yah knowing 2 of my closest people like this band, i said to myself.. why not? jadi langkah pertama saya untuk cari tahu tentang ini band adalah.. minta sample mp3nya ke widy, hehehe.. (males banget deh gw). trus gw dengerin.. ouch.. ulm terpana dan langsung suka!
dah gitu gw yg mule nyari2 websiteny si mew kan, trus ada satu song yang gw suka banget, 'she spider' keren abis pokoknya.. pas nyari lirikny di google, turned out klo tu lagu dipake buat soundtracknya 'Spiderman 2'and i was like,.. 'WHAT??' hehehe.. d websiteny si Mew juga ad lagu2 laen dari albumny yg paling baru 'Frengers' (Frengers, they said means not friends but yet not strangers). So i listened to the song, which was streamed from the beginning till the end instead of a 30 second demo. And there's this one song, 'Her Voice is Louder than Her Years' yg ada suara cewekny. Pengen tau siapa yg nyanyi, gw ngubek2 websitenya, akhirnya tau klo vokal cewek di lagu itu was performed by Stina Nordenstam. Namanya aneh ya.. i bet it's Danish ;p well anyway, gw ngerasa klo tu nama asli familiar abis, so i googled the name (F.Y.I. kata guru gw, pak Don Ropes, istilah 'Googled' udah scr tidak resmi masuk k dalam vocabulary bahasa Inggris) and found her website, tapi d sono gw ga nemu judul lagu or nama album yg familiar. Masih penasaran gw cek ke VH1 en Launch, but still.. ga ad juga. But then, just like out of the blue, (benernya ga juga sih, Allah yg ngingetin gw), gw inget klo ada lagu d Soundtrackny Romeo and Juliet (klo masi inget, itu pelm teen-romance yg paling keren d akhir abad 20) yg judulny 'Little Star'. Who's the singer? yepp.. STINA NORDENSTAM! hahaha.. aduh gilaaa gw yg langsung sneng gitu. Pasalny gw suka banget ma ni lagu, and glad bisa ngetrack lagi penyanyinya! She has this unique voice, and i missed her, hohoho... langkah selanjutny, of course nyari mp3nya.. tapi karena ga ada Kazaa, me cari pake metacrawler. Nemu sih, tapi hasil remix-an Little Star. Not bad, rada drum n bass gitu kali ya. Further on, ga nemu mp3 yg memuaskan :(
Well yah.. berkat brosing2, tanya sana-sini.. i could collect a few pieces to put on my inspiration corner. So kini nama Mew dan Stina berdampingan dengan Thom Yorke, Gorillaz, Blur, Oasis, dll., di pojok ruang inspirasi saya :) Oh i love the internet, i love those f*ckin cool rock bands! ge inget dulu nyari2 the wannadies, death cab for cutie n juga tuesday child, prlu ngubek ngubek seluruh world wide web yg sangat very cramped dengan promotional stuffs, new ideologies, ads, pop-ups, silly directories, and many more. Yg waktu gw nyari tuesday child lbih lucu lagi.. but i'm not going to talk about it now, cuz i'm so damn sleepy :p so anyway, hari ini.. saya nyatakan sebagai hari pencarian inspirasi, sbnernya frase 'divine inspiration' gw colong dari Tickle.com ;p dari tes yg gw ikutin, katanya sih gw dapet divine inspiration dari Learning New Things. Well I guess once more the quiz was right ;)
Btw sampe saat post ini dipublish, ak blum nemu gambar yg ngeliatin 4 personel bandnya, lengkap, tapi juga ga ngerusak layout blog :p so.. gambar sang vokalis, Jonas Bjerre saya rasa cukup mewakili, heheheh..
pikiran negatif di kepala dan selamat ulang tahun untuk mereka
blog ini dibuat pada tanggal 21 july 2004, jam 2.02 dini hari. pastinya post ini akan dipublish melebihi tanggal segitu. cuma mau bilang, pikiran ini yg bikin aku stuck ga bisa ke mana mana, aku masih belum tahu cara completely got rid off it. terlalu banyak hal hal yang bikin aku kecewa, atau bisa juga dibilang kalo aku gampang kecewa. gampang kecewa karena pikiran negatif? atau karena berpikir negatif lantas kecewa? well.. bisa dibilang kalo itu lingkaran setan..
ak sering ngerasa lonely, ga punya temen yg bener2 temen, mungkin juga pertama2 yg disalahin aku sendiri. aku ga ngehargain merekA2 yg dulu pernah dekat sama aku dan berada disekitarku. i wasted them all and now i have none. klo mo dicari penyebabnya, simple.. aku terlalu anggap remeh, dan aku ga pernah spend extra energy buat invest dalam berteman. i invest most of my energy on self-indulgence and self-despise yg ujung2ny bikin aku gampang naik turun moodnya.
sekarang ini ngerasa kalo ga bisa spend things buat temen2dan orang sekitarku lagi, kayakny aku mesti belajar berbenah diri dulu; starting from taking a good care of my responsibilites. aku at least udah berhasil dateng tepat wktu ke tempat kerjaku for the past 2 weeks, blum bgitu lama, but at least.. an improvement.. ak berusaha nginget janji2 k temen2ku n brusaha nepatin. aku ga bisa dulu punya niat 'buat temen' aku lebih pengen punya niat 'untuk aku sendiri juga'. at least it would make me feel better. gw dulu despise orang2 yang berbuat baik sama orang tapi ujung2ny ya buat diri dia sendiri juga, 'buat ngerasa tenang' (another konstruksi pikiran negatif).. but dipikir2 lagi, aku yo ga boleh gitu. pertama2 punya hak apa aku buat ngenilai niat orang? aku bukan Tuhan. Kedua, toch org yg ditolong juga ga nanyain niat, klo mo bantu ya bantu,
so i think aku harus lbih banyak self-explore lagi. ngusahain ygterbaik from my own self. aku ga berani ngeliat terlalu jauh kedepan (meaning: mau jadi manusia seperti apa saya? habis ini mau kemana?) karena saya tidak punya sama sekali bayangan atau jawaban atas itu. Pikiran negatifku selalu bilang, "kamu akan gagal, kamu itu nobody, kamu ga bisa apa2, and you would be stuck in your life, wandering around your sucking life. ga ngapa2in n ga punya apa2 n ga punya siapa2. you even will be considered lucky to still be alive at such age". jahat sekali ya? tapi entah mengapa aku juga sangat mencintainya, mencintai pikiran negatifku. terkadang dia datang, tidak.. dia kupanggil untuk masuk ke dalam kepalaku. wahh kok jadi merasa ini masalah psikologis yg rumit sekali?
aku rasa harus mulai bikin goal untuk diri sendiri. Well here they are:
1. lebih tanggung jawab
2. hindari pikiran negatif
3. lebih berusaha buat cheerful
4. be an attentive listener
5. hindari tendensi untuk jadi pengecut
6. appreciate myself a bit more
7. jangan takut and be yourself, jangan gunain rasa takut sebagai alesan buat ngehalangin 6 goal di atas
hehh.. kok banyak ya? ah iya.. selagi aku meratapi nasib, some people i know and are dear to me are having their birthday quite close to one another. happy birthday to nena, my pal since elementary school; rawdy, my youngest bro; mba mel-tje and mas djarwo, the dynamic duo of marcopolostraat. May God bless you all.. (btw, mau tahu apa kata pikiran negatifku saat ini?: "sok imut kamu! sok baek!".)
ak sering ngerasa lonely, ga punya temen yg bener2 temen, mungkin juga pertama2 yg disalahin aku sendiri. aku ga ngehargain merekA2 yg dulu pernah dekat sama aku dan berada disekitarku. i wasted them all and now i have none. klo mo dicari penyebabnya, simple.. aku terlalu anggap remeh, dan aku ga pernah spend extra energy buat invest dalam berteman. i invest most of my energy on self-indulgence and self-despise yg ujung2ny bikin aku gampang naik turun moodnya.
sekarang ini ngerasa kalo ga bisa spend things buat temen2dan orang sekitarku lagi, kayakny aku mesti belajar berbenah diri dulu; starting from taking a good care of my responsibilites. aku at least udah berhasil dateng tepat wktu ke tempat kerjaku for the past 2 weeks, blum bgitu lama, but at least.. an improvement.. ak berusaha nginget janji2 k temen2ku n brusaha nepatin. aku ga bisa dulu punya niat 'buat temen' aku lebih pengen punya niat 'untuk aku sendiri juga'. at least it would make me feel better. gw dulu despise orang2 yang berbuat baik sama orang tapi ujung2ny ya buat diri dia sendiri juga, 'buat ngerasa tenang' (another konstruksi pikiran negatif).. but dipikir2 lagi, aku yo ga boleh gitu. pertama2 punya hak apa aku buat ngenilai niat orang? aku bukan Tuhan. Kedua, toch org yg ditolong juga ga nanyain niat, klo mo bantu ya bantu,
so i think aku harus lbih banyak self-explore lagi. ngusahain ygterbaik from my own self. aku ga berani ngeliat terlalu jauh kedepan (meaning: mau jadi manusia seperti apa saya? habis ini mau kemana?) karena saya tidak punya sama sekali bayangan atau jawaban atas itu. Pikiran negatifku selalu bilang, "kamu akan gagal, kamu itu nobody, kamu ga bisa apa2, and you would be stuck in your life, wandering around your sucking life. ga ngapa2in n ga punya apa2 n ga punya siapa2. you even will be considered lucky to still be alive at such age". jahat sekali ya? tapi entah mengapa aku juga sangat mencintainya, mencintai pikiran negatifku. terkadang dia datang, tidak.. dia kupanggil untuk masuk ke dalam kepalaku. wahh kok jadi merasa ini masalah psikologis yg rumit sekali?
aku rasa harus mulai bikin goal untuk diri sendiri. Well here they are:
1. lebih tanggung jawab
2. hindari pikiran negatif
3. lebih berusaha buat cheerful
4. be an attentive listener
5. hindari tendensi untuk jadi pengecut
6. appreciate myself a bit more
7. jangan takut and be yourself, jangan gunain rasa takut sebagai alesan buat ngehalangin 6 goal di atas
hehh.. kok banyak ya? ah iya.. selagi aku meratapi nasib, some people i know and are dear to me are having their birthday quite close to one another. happy birthday to nena, my pal since elementary school; rawdy, my youngest bro; mba mel-tje and mas djarwo, the dynamic duo of marcopolostraat. May God bless you all.. (btw, mau tahu apa kata pikiran negatifku saat ini?: "sok imut kamu! sok baek!".)
As I was Doing My Visual Communication Resit
As I was doing my resit assignment for my Visual Communication today, a tune from the Cure was played on my realplayer jukebox. I stopped for a couple of minute and tried to remember the new song from the Cure. The leader, the great-grandfather of britPop, is back. The next thing I noticed was that dancing ‘Annabelle the Sheep’. I set my real player preferences to ‘display on top when playing’. Resulting this dancing sheep with her (or his?) aliens, mole, stupid red bird friends to display their erratic nods and jumps while I write on Word or doing something else. I just recognized that they do jump and nod in rhythmically, not just a programmed two nods per second per three jumps or something like that. I almost believed that the sheep was really enjoying the songs that I played.
But again, this is the proof that I never seemed to be able to put my mind focused on something. I could not avoid the tendency of me jumping to do something else while haven’t finished the thing that I’m doing earlier.
Some sentences that I grabbed from Outkast’s ‘the Whole World’
ain’t that true? Well the conclusion we almost love (or hate) everyone on TV. It’s a love/hate thing. Now I get what that means. I always thought that people have to tolerate! There are parts you hate, and parts you love. But to a few things it has to be either one.
13:18:50 Skipped Stylistic’s You Make Me Feel Brand New (YMMFBN). And remembered that I used that title (the acronym) as my nickname, and then someone copied it, well they put other titles to such acronym and make it their nickname. A couple of times I was copied, I guess. What I wrote the other person also wrote (with very slight alteration). I hate copycats, I always do. Like my interest in using symbolized characters, mix them with alphabetical characters. For example: f.o(r e)xa~mp|Le*. Interesting, huh? I guess they call it appropriationns. I like to manipulate and disturb existing systems or rules. I love working with them, but also I love to bring them down. So yeah, I was annoyed of being copied at. Until I realize that sometimes I also copied. Mostly on people that I like or admire. I used to imagine myself being them while talking to someone or doing something. Having that person in mind help me to act more normally (I guess).
Then it made me realize more that we do that so much often. Nothing in this world is original (apart from His creation). Well okay, ALMOST. Most of them are the product of appropriation, bricolages, and counter-bricolages (borrowing the phrase from Sturken and Cartwright). meaning, we put things ideas we saw around us, modified them and then create something, claiming them as our creations.
13:28:04 still working on the introduction. So…slow, and very mind-crushing. I guess (I hope), well.. not hoping, I have to be sure. I am now to avoid everything with ‘hope’ because I am more likely to use it as an excuse of failing at something.
14:54:03 what do you want me to say? What do you want me to do? To make you know that I do mean it.. (Dismemberment Plan). Us and our commercialized self. To be as hypocritical as I want to be, I could not say that I AM NOT commercialized. I am still looking for an identity, and the commerciality of myself would not be a point that I want to scrutiny.
>>>You Send Me Flowers, Silje Nergaard.. CUTE!
16:13:45 Just like me.. they long to be.. close to you… a jazzy version of the carpenters’ legendary song was included in the North Sea Jazz 2004 compilation. Sang by the American-celebrated jazz duo, Tuck & Patti. Beautiful, and compelling. Well it has been a very nice song, and the soothing jazz singer just added its glories.
The funny thing was when they added their own version of the song…
...and gold and starlight on your eyes of blue.. or maybe grey, or maybe green, or were they brown?’ now I wonder why did they do that…
Mind wanderings at 01:40:43
I was told that only 9 students made the Oral Communication exam in my class. The rest had to take the resit test on Wednesday 13.10 o’clock. (Attention to readers: this is a wrong usage of o’clock). Well I knew six or maybe eight people who made it, I am not sure about the ninth… but I am sure it was not me. Well minutes before I know the people who had past the exam, I was feeling a bit like Charlie in Dahl’s ‘Charlie and the Chocolate Factory’ when he heard about the golden tickets. ‘Five golden tickets have been spread in Willy Wonka Chocolate bars all around the world. Only five people could enter the factory as the promised prize.’ So… nine golden ticket holders were out there, being glad every minute because they knew they don’t have to face the test for the second time. And I guess my chance of getting them are just as small as Charlie… no wait, Charlie finally got the golden ticket, well then I felt like I was the kid who cheered on Charlie when the news of the fifth holder of the golden ticket was announced on the telly, uh.. I mean TV.
Btw, at this hour… 15 damn pages of Visual Communication bullshits.
02:49:24 on to page 16 (shit, I wrote like 1 page per hour… slow-mo!). Listening to Garbage’s ‘When I Grow Up’, very very me ^^
And guess what I heard 30 minutes later, Sheila on Seven’s ‘Perhatikan Rani’. Am I surprised! The program said that I last played the track on the 25th of May, whoa… that long??? Gee... I neglected my Indonesian songs quite far-off. But well yeah, am not too fond of this band anyway. It’s nice to hear ‘em again though, and then my mind started to wander off to my high school period, when everything should be as carefree as I want them to be. I guess I am being too self-depressed to enjoy my teenage life. I regret it now.
But again, this is the proof that I never seemed to be able to put my mind focused on something. I could not avoid the tendency of me jumping to do something else while haven’t finished the thing that I’m doing earlier.
Some sentences that I grabbed from Outkast’s ‘the Whole World’
Cause the whole, world, loves it when you don't get down
(Bah bah-da, bah bah bah-da da)
And the whole, world, loves it when you make that sound
(Bah bah-da, bah bah bah-da da)
And the whole, world, loves it when you're in the news
(Bah bah-da, bah bah bah-da da)
And the whole, world, loves it when you sang the blues
(Bah bah-da, bah bah bah-da da)
ain’t that true? Well the conclusion we almost love (or hate) everyone on TV. It’s a love/hate thing. Now I get what that means. I always thought that people have to tolerate! There are parts you hate, and parts you love. But to a few things it has to be either one.
13:18:50 Skipped Stylistic’s You Make Me Feel Brand New (YMMFBN). And remembered that I used that title (the acronym) as my nickname, and then someone copied it, well they put other titles to such acronym and make it their nickname. A couple of times I was copied, I guess. What I wrote the other person also wrote (with very slight alteration). I hate copycats, I always do. Like my interest in using symbolized characters, mix them with alphabetical characters. For example: f.o(r e)xa~mp|Le*. Interesting, huh? I guess they call it appropriationns. I like to manipulate and disturb existing systems or rules. I love working with them, but also I love to bring them down. So yeah, I was annoyed of being copied at. Until I realize that sometimes I also copied. Mostly on people that I like or admire. I used to imagine myself being them while talking to someone or doing something. Having that person in mind help me to act more normally (I guess).
Then it made me realize more that we do that so much often. Nothing in this world is original (apart from His creation). Well okay, ALMOST. Most of them are the product of appropriation, bricolages, and counter-bricolages (borrowing the phrase from Sturken and Cartwright). meaning, we put things ideas we saw around us, modified them and then create something, claiming them as our creations.
13:28:04 still working on the introduction. So…slow, and very mind-crushing. I guess (I hope), well.. not hoping, I have to be sure. I am now to avoid everything with ‘hope’ because I am more likely to use it as an excuse of failing at something.
14:54:03 what do you want me to say? What do you want me to do? To make you know that I do mean it.. (Dismemberment Plan). Us and our commercialized self. To be as hypocritical as I want to be, I could not say that I AM NOT commercialized. I am still looking for an identity, and the commerciality of myself would not be a point that I want to scrutiny.
>>>You Send Me Flowers, Silje Nergaard.. CUTE!
16:13:45 Just like me.. they long to be.. close to you… a jazzy version of the carpenters’ legendary song was included in the North Sea Jazz 2004 compilation. Sang by the American-celebrated jazz duo, Tuck & Patti. Beautiful, and compelling. Well it has been a very nice song, and the soothing jazz singer just added its glories.
The funny thing was when they added their own version of the song…
...and gold and starlight on your eyes of blue.. or maybe grey, or maybe green, or were they brown?’ now I wonder why did they do that…
Mind wanderings at 01:40:43
I was told that only 9 students made the Oral Communication exam in my class. The rest had to take the resit test on Wednesday 13.10 o’clock. (Attention to readers: this is a wrong usage of o’clock). Well I knew six or maybe eight people who made it, I am not sure about the ninth… but I am sure it was not me. Well minutes before I know the people who had past the exam, I was feeling a bit like Charlie in Dahl’s ‘Charlie and the Chocolate Factory’ when he heard about the golden tickets. ‘Five golden tickets have been spread in Willy Wonka Chocolate bars all around the world. Only five people could enter the factory as the promised prize.’ So… nine golden ticket holders were out there, being glad every minute because they knew they don’t have to face the test for the second time. And I guess my chance of getting them are just as small as Charlie… no wait, Charlie finally got the golden ticket, well then I felt like I was the kid who cheered on Charlie when the news of the fifth holder of the golden ticket was announced on the telly, uh.. I mean TV.
Btw, at this hour… 15 damn pages of Visual Communication bullshits.
02:49:24 on to page 16 (shit, I wrote like 1 page per hour… slow-mo!). Listening to Garbage’s ‘When I Grow Up’, very very me ^^
And guess what I heard 30 minutes later, Sheila on Seven’s ‘Perhatikan Rani’. Am I surprised! The program said that I last played the track on the 25th of May, whoa… that long??? Gee... I neglected my Indonesian songs quite far-off. But well yeah, am not too fond of this band anyway. It’s nice to hear ‘em again though, and then my mind started to wander off to my high school period, when everything should be as carefree as I want them to be. I guess I am being too self-depressed to enjoy my teenage life. I regret it now.
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