i usually dont really care about what other ppl say/think.. dont care about 'credibility'.. following my own weird drumbeats.. but lately what ive done was messing with my own life and other ppl's..
myb locking myself away from the society is better xp
i guess im gonna stick with this 'lifestyle' for awhile..
meh.. okay okay.. not locking myself away.. that's too dramatized...
rehab day 2 or sticky chicken day
ze ingrédients:
chicken (obviously)
lemon
pepper
thyme
parsley
honey (or any other substance to make it sticky.. but prefrably honey..)
soy sauce
olive oil
(sherry) vinegar
a head of garlic (or yours.. doesnt matter, but it gotta be sliced)
ze opération
heat oil, chop chicken to pieces, fry until chicken changes colour.
sprinkle in pepper, 1-2 tbsp soy sauce, vinegar, n 3-4 tbsp oil
slice lemon, spread evenly on top of chicken.. wait 4-5 minutes
add garlic, some water, cook some more until chicken gets brownish/caramel colour
add 3 tbsp honey then sprinkle in the thyme
chop parsley, sprinkle over chicken..
stir em a bit..
and done :D
via mr. Kunto via youtube
...
and now for the less happy note..
i hate you.. for no reason
cause actually i hate myself..
maybe i hate you for making me hate myself..
but in the end i just hate myself more for hating you for making me hate myself..
i hate this world -_-
btw, reached sura 9. At-Taubah (Repentance) or Al Bara'ah (Ultimatum).. I dont know why one prefer one name than the other.. It's the only sura in Koran that does not start with Basmallah. RK convinced that it's related to the mathematical pattern of Koran that makes it safe from tampering. ...and, he concluded that this Sura ends at verse 127. The last two verses, verse 128 and 129 are.. fake.
chicken (obviously)
lemon
pepper
thyme
parsley
honey (or any other substance to make it sticky.. but prefrably honey..)
soy sauce
olive oil
(sherry) vinegar
a head of garlic (or yours.. doesnt matter, but it gotta be sliced)
ze opération
heat oil, chop chicken to pieces, fry until chicken changes colour.
sprinkle in pepper, 1-2 tbsp soy sauce, vinegar, n 3-4 tbsp oil
slice lemon, spread evenly on top of chicken.. wait 4-5 minutes
add garlic, some water, cook some more until chicken gets brownish/caramel colour
add 3 tbsp honey then sprinkle in the thyme
chop parsley, sprinkle over chicken..
stir em a bit..
and done :D
via mr. Kunto via youtube
...
and now for the less happy note..
i hate you.. for no reason
cause actually i hate myself..
maybe i hate you for making me hate myself..
but in the end i just hate myself more for hating you for making me hate myself..
i hate this world -_-
btw, reached sura 9. At-Taubah (Repentance) or Al Bara'ah (Ultimatum).. I dont know why one prefer one name than the other.. It's the only sura in Koran that does not start with Basmallah. RK convinced that it's related to the mathematical pattern of Koran that makes it safe from tampering. ...and, he concluded that this Sura ends at verse 127. The last two verses, verse 128 and 129 are.. fake.
rehab day 1
after.. the whole post-break up mess thing. (includes: asked mr. ex to come back, sent frantic emails, texts to him, his mum, my parents, bugging my bestfriends for hours.. bitching complaining.. whining.. *sigh the whole roller-coaster of "i want him back" "no i dont" "i miss him" "im just gonna torture that poor guy")
lemme see its been.. 10 days? i kept a "manual" journal. means its not digital.. old fashioned pen and paper-diary =D
i promised myself (well also encouraged by mr. ex) to.. fix my life. be stronger. the whole package. and since i dont really have anything to do =p no need to go outside or socialize or have any activity like any normal ppl do xp basically sentencing myself to the lifestyle of a hermit =p (Uhm wait.. i hv always been... kinda.. sorta......)
so i decided to go back to God. Challenge myself kind of thing. I just passed one day of doing the 5 contact prayers.. it's TOUGH. i havent done it for a long time. and i didnt want it to be just prayers, i wanted it to be where i really concentrated on the dua's that i cited,their meanings, tasbih afterwards, read verses from the Koran and their meaning, think about it,use it in my closing dua, and end the "ritual" with a 'gratitude sujud'. afterwards i checkd the indonesian translation with the one from rashad kalifa (there are a lot of controversies on him, but i like his works.. and my Dad likes him, so.. =p but umm yea i know i shouldnt follow him 'blindly'. but this is by far what i got.).. i mean those indonesian translation sometimes sounds confusing. No wonder ppl lost interest in reading them and concentrate more on tajwid and how to make beautiful noises out of it. Dad installed RK's 'Quran- The Final Testament' (he got it from a friend of his.. there r some programmes available here, but none of them is what i have) when he was here and its really handy. Complete with footnotes and appendices.
And try to.. let's say.. be "pure" again. Like, try to completely surrender my soul to God. Which actually requires me to trust my own "soul" and believe in it. And its hard. Im used to being sceptic and not believing. especially towards myself.
and so.. i decided to "rehab" myself.. for at least 3 days xD well, i want to see if i can go through the 3 days and continue it.. for a week... i mean.. its hard.. i think.. especially umm if im done 'rehab'-ing, and want to live 'righteous'ly, understand Koran and try to apply it in daily life.. geez.. i dunno when that day would come or will i even reach that stage. this has only been one day, 5 prayers, and 104 verses.. it's already felt heavy =p especially when u read those verses and realised ure not living your life the way you're spposed to be. *sigh and yea, a lot to remember.. a lot of things need to be applied..
The real test is the "world out there". For example, "When the devil whispers to you any whisper, seek refuge in God; He is Hearer, Omniscient. Those who are righteous, whenever the devil approaches them with an idea, they remember (God), whereupon they become seers" (Indonesian translation version: they can see that its the devil) - The Purgatory/Al A'Raaf 200-201.
Seems pretty simple but .. u bet know that its hard xD u cant always.. remember. even if i stay at home, i still have this urge to b*tch n moan.. and when i go outside.. i meet people.. see stuffs.. and people here dont care about God.. and they're fine.. of course the Koran said they wouldnt be fine in the Hereafter, but they dont even believe in the Hereafter. They're enjoying the moment! Whats not a bigger temptation than that? =p
And I just finished the 8th Sura 'Spoils of War' (Al Anfaal).. it really got interesting stuffs. And and i think moslems should read their Koran everyday, not only citing madly to those arabic letters, but also its meanings. Also I know in Indonesia, people are a bit discouraged from learning the Koran cause they have to learn to read this whole new language with its weird symbols and rules... My dad was one of them =p but thank God he awesomely overcame it and after that he always showered us with the beauty and wonder of our religion (love you, Dad)..
when i was a kid i was pretty proud of myself who could do all 5 prayers in a day (still remember that Dad only obliged me to do the Subuh and the Maghrib ones), read the Koran,... and i thought my life would be fine.. but NOOOOOO.. its not that easy... =p And i know, here, its hard to do all 5 prayers (my excuse at least). . I skipped once or twice and then decided to 'go easy' on myself and ended up never really doing it =p and i started to do other, many unrighteous things as well.. (pls dont ask about it =p)
umm yea.. so we'll see.. am i gonna disappoint myself as usual.. or .. not.. uhm 2 days to go.. haha..
And let me close the post with this:
lemme see its been.. 10 days? i kept a "manual" journal. means its not digital.. old fashioned pen and paper-diary =D
i promised myself (well also encouraged by mr. ex) to.. fix my life. be stronger. the whole package. and since i dont really have anything to do =p no need to go outside or socialize or have any activity like any normal ppl do xp basically sentencing myself to the lifestyle of a hermit =p (Uhm wait.. i hv always been... kinda.. sorta......)
so i decided to go back to God. Challenge myself kind of thing. I just passed one day of doing the 5 contact prayers.. it's TOUGH. i havent done it for a long time. and i didnt want it to be just prayers, i wanted it to be where i really concentrated on the dua's that i cited,their meanings, tasbih afterwards, read verses from the Koran and their meaning, think about it,use it in my closing dua, and end the "ritual" with a 'gratitude sujud'. afterwards i checkd the indonesian translation with the one from rashad kalifa (there are a lot of controversies on him, but i like his works.. and my Dad likes him, so.. =p but umm yea i know i shouldnt follow him 'blindly'. but this is by far what i got.).. i mean those indonesian translation sometimes sounds confusing. No wonder ppl lost interest in reading them and concentrate more on tajwid and how to make beautiful noises out of it. Dad installed RK's 'Quran- The Final Testament' (he got it from a friend of his.. there r some programmes available here, but none of them is what i have) when he was here and its really handy. Complete with footnotes and appendices.
And try to.. let's say.. be "pure" again. Like, try to completely surrender my soul to God. Which actually requires me to trust my own "soul" and believe in it. And its hard. Im used to being sceptic and not believing. especially towards myself.
and so.. i decided to "rehab" myself.. for at least 3 days xD well, i want to see if i can go through the 3 days and continue it.. for a week... i mean.. its hard.. i think.. especially umm if im done 'rehab'-ing, and want to live 'righteous'ly, understand Koran and try to apply it in daily life.. geez.. i dunno when that day would come or will i even reach that stage. this has only been one day, 5 prayers, and 104 verses.. it's already felt heavy =p especially when u read those verses and realised ure not living your life the way you're spposed to be. *sigh and yea, a lot to remember.. a lot of things need to be applied..
The real test is the "world out there". For example, "When the devil whispers to you any whisper, seek refuge in God; He is Hearer, Omniscient. Those who are righteous, whenever the devil approaches them with an idea, they remember (God), whereupon they become seers" (Indonesian translation version: they can see that its the devil) - The Purgatory/Al A'Raaf 200-201.
Seems pretty simple but .. u bet know that its hard xD u cant always.. remember. even if i stay at home, i still have this urge to b*tch n moan.. and when i go outside.. i meet people.. see stuffs.. and people here dont care about God.. and they're fine.. of course the Koran said they wouldnt be fine in the Hereafter, but they dont even believe in the Hereafter. They're enjoying the moment! Whats not a bigger temptation than that? =p
And I just finished the 8th Sura 'Spoils of War' (Al Anfaal).. it really got interesting stuffs. And and i think moslems should read their Koran everyday, not only citing madly to those arabic letters, but also its meanings. Also I know in Indonesia, people are a bit discouraged from learning the Koran cause they have to learn to read this whole new language with its weird symbols and rules... My dad was one of them =p but thank God he awesomely overcame it and after that he always showered us with the beauty and wonder of our religion (love you, Dad)..
when i was a kid i was pretty proud of myself who could do all 5 prayers in a day (still remember that Dad only obliged me to do the Subuh and the Maghrib ones), read the Koran,... and i thought my life would be fine.. but NOOOOOO.. its not that easy... =p And i know, here, its hard to do all 5 prayers (my excuse at least). . I skipped once or twice and then decided to 'go easy' on myself and ended up never really doing it =p and i started to do other, many unrighteous things as well.. (pls dont ask about it =p)
umm yea.. so we'll see.. am i gonna disappoint myself as usual.. or .. not.. uhm 2 days to go.. haha..
And let me close the post with this:
Thus, you should not grieve over anything you miss, nor be proud of anything He has bestowed upon you. God does not love those who are boastful, proud. (Iron/Al-Hadeed:57)Ahum.. God bless you all =]
all hail everything shiny..!
From my little sister's blog
My brother Rawdy has turned his own room into a (pretend) country named "Metal Man" -,- Yeah, I know, it doesn't make any sense at all and it sounds silly, but it's true!And he made a flag too! xD
A few days ago, he made ID cards for me, my mom, my older sister and even my maid, so we can enter "Negara Metal Man" by showing that ID card (that was made from paper with crayon writings on it).
After he made ID cards, he started to make some rules to enter "Negara Metal Man", and then he sticked it on the wall..
aawwww...
i mean, look at her.. we both got the bangs xD envy her wavy hair tho.. how come she has it? can i already pass as her classmate?
*ngarep*
me n my sister have 7 years difference
i'll give myself a one-liner
"Passive-aggressive bullsh*t..."
Someday I will walk away and say
You disappoint me
Maybe you're better off this way
...
Why can't you turn and face me?
Why can't you turn against me?
(A Perfect Circle-Passive)
Someday I will walk away and say
You disappoint me
Maybe you're better off this way
...
Why can't you turn and face me?
Why can't you turn against me?
(A Perfect Circle-Passive)
u know ure getting old, when...
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